1 00:00:03,360 --> 00:00:05,880 My shooting arm is shot, O'Connell. 2 00:00:05,920 --> 00:00:09,480 You gave 150 vaccinations today. You put in a pretty good day's work. 3 00:00:09,560 --> 00:00:13,480 I wish they could have found another way to show their appreciation. 4 00:00:13,560 --> 00:00:17,000 Caribou pelt parka. Maybe a nice seal gut raincoat. 5 00:00:17,080 --> 00:00:21,720 They gave you a great tribute. To them, that's a delicacy back there. 6 00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:24,360 Fifty pounds of whale blubber? 7 00:00:24,440 --> 00:00:27,760 I feel like I'm being wafted to death by fish fumes. 8 00:00:27,840 --> 00:00:31,440 My-My eyes are stinging. My-My-My throat is constricting. 9 00:00:31,520 --> 00:00:33,440 What was that? 10 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:37,720 Just a little turbulence, Fleischman, like the last 87,000 times. 11 00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:40,960 - It felt like a bird. Are you sure it wasn't a bird? - It wasn't a bird. 12 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:43,440 Go ahead, laugh. Logan Airport, 1973, 13 00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:47,720 an entire 747, filled to capacity, was- fell to the earth like a stone... 14 00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:51,240 because of an-an innocent flock of whatchamacallits. 15 00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:54,160 Starlings. And 88 people died. 16 00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:56,080 Please, God, let this plane land. 17 00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:58,280 Let me sleep in my own bed one more time... 18 00:00:58,360 --> 00:01:00,880 in that drafty, miserable little shack she rents me. 19 00:01:00,960 --> 00:01:03,880 I'll never shave another stroke off my golf game again. I promise. 20 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:10,840 What? We're losing altitude. 21 00:01:10,920 --> 00:01:13,280 Come on. That's not funny, O'Connell. Not even as a joke. 22 00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:16,240 This is Cessna 4423 Victor. I'd like to declare an emergency. 23 00:01:16,320 --> 00:01:19,040 Cut it out, O'Connell! I'm having trouble maintaining altitude. 24 00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:22,000 Unable to reach any airport. I'm going in for an emergency landing. 25 00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:23,640 Oh, no. 26 00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:27,200 Location approximately 130 miles off Aniakchak. V.O.R. on the 270-degree radial. 27 00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:31,480 I see a clearing. Looks adequate. I'm going in for a landing. No time to check the terrain. 28 00:01:31,520 --> 00:01:34,840 Oh, God, O'Connell. God! Oh, God! 29 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:42,074 -= www.OpenSubtitles.org =- 30 00:02:19,752 --> 00:02:21,512 Get out. I can't open the door. 31 00:02:21,592 --> 00:02:25,832 Fleischman, just get out. I've got to check the plane. Okay. 32 00:02:25,912 --> 00:02:29,912 Nothing seems to be broken. No evidence of concussion. 33 00:02:29,952 --> 00:02:32,792 No apparent contusion. My legs are here. 34 00:02:34,112 --> 00:02:36,312 I'm alive. I'm alive! 35 00:02:36,392 --> 00:02:38,872 I'm alive! I'm alive! We're alive, O'Connell! 36 00:02:38,952 --> 00:02:41,792 You did it! You're the most wonderful pilot known to man and woman. 37 00:02:41,872 --> 00:02:44,632 You are a genius! Do you know that? A fabulous, wonderful genius! 38 00:02:44,672 --> 00:02:47,832 I am grateful to you for the rest of my life. Come here. 39 00:02:47,912 --> 00:02:51,392 Get away! Watch it! Cut it out! This is not a picnic! 40 00:02:51,472 --> 00:02:54,552 We're alive, O'Connell! We didn't perish in a ball of flame. It's a miracle! 41 00:02:54,592 --> 00:02:57,992 Yeah, well, tell that to the engine. The engine? 42 00:02:58,072 --> 00:03:01,112 I mean, we lost power, in case you didn't notice. 43 00:03:01,152 --> 00:03:04,312 What's wrong with it? I don't know, Fleischman. I can't tell yet. 44 00:03:04,392 --> 00:03:07,232 It's not like it's wearing a sign. 45 00:03:07,312 --> 00:03:10,792 You think it's broken? Very perceptive. 46 00:03:10,872 --> 00:03:14,112 Yeah, Fleischman, in all likelihood, I think something's broken. 47 00:03:14,192 --> 00:03:16,512 I would say in all probability something's broken. 48 00:03:16,592 --> 00:03:19,072 All right. Can you fix it? I hope so. 49 00:03:19,152 --> 00:03:21,472 Can't you call the airplane version of the Triple A? 50 00:03:21,552 --> 00:03:25,152 Fleischman, this isn't Central Park. It's the Anaktuvuk Preserve. 51 00:03:25,232 --> 00:03:27,872 It's 4.2 million acres of genuine wilderness. 52 00:03:27,952 --> 00:03:30,472 It'll take two or three days for someone to get to us. 53 00:03:30,552 --> 00:03:33,272 And that's if the weather holds. Two to three days? 54 00:03:33,312 --> 00:03:35,992 - If we're lucky. - Well, what are we gonna eat? 55 00:03:36,072 --> 00:03:38,952 Where are we gonna sleep? What if an animal visits? 56 00:03:39,032 --> 00:03:42,592 - Visits? You mean, like, unannounced? - Yeah. 57 00:03:42,672 --> 00:03:45,672 We'll just invite him or her into the parlor and offer them a glass of lemonade. 58 00:03:47,832 --> 00:03:51,152 Sittin'in thejaws of the Anaktuvuk, are they? 59 00:03:51,232 --> 00:03:53,112 Yep. Safe and sound. 60 00:03:53,152 --> 00:03:56,112 Fish and Game says it'll take a few days to get 'em out of there though. 61 00:03:56,192 --> 00:04:00,312 I used to hunt over that way. That is, until I gave up the great sport of killing. 62 00:04:00,392 --> 00:04:02,232 Mm. Excellent goat country. 63 00:04:05,352 --> 00:04:09,432 - Can I help you? - I'm looking for Shelly Tambo. 64 00:04:09,472 --> 00:04:13,512 She's over to the store just now, but I expect her back momentarily. Oh. 65 00:04:13,592 --> 00:04:15,512 Would you care to sit? Nah. 66 00:04:15,592 --> 00:04:20,512 I've been on the road for hours, and my buns are squished. 67 00:04:20,592 --> 00:04:22,952 Oh. Well, here she is now. Shelly? 68 00:04:23,032 --> 00:04:27,032 Hi, babe. I got enough lard to sink a ship, and our ant poison finally came in. 69 00:04:27,072 --> 00:04:31,112 - Shelly? Shelly Tambo? - Cindy? 70 00:04:31,192 --> 00:04:36,472 I didn't even recognize you. You look... so old. 71 00:04:36,552 --> 00:04:38,112 You lost weight. 72 00:04:38,192 --> 00:04:41,672 Traveling around with the guys so much, who's got time to eat? 73 00:04:41,752 --> 00:04:44,312 The team's fifth in the Pan-Canadian minors now. 74 00:04:44,352 --> 00:04:47,992 They're letting Wayne start. Left wing. Huh. 75 00:04:51,472 --> 00:04:54,632 - Wayne here too? - No. Just me. 76 00:04:54,712 --> 00:04:59,952 - What are you doing here? - Well, Wayne drank a case of beer... 77 00:05:00,032 --> 00:05:02,592 after they lost to Athabasca night before last, 78 00:05:02,672 --> 00:05:07,352 and he told me that you and him are not divorced. 79 00:05:07,432 --> 00:05:11,192 He tells me this after we've been hitched for six months. 80 00:05:11,232 --> 00:05:14,232 You didn't even ask to see papers or anything? 81 00:05:14,312 --> 00:05:17,192 Well, no. I took him at his word. 82 00:05:17,272 --> 00:05:20,672 Which would've been fine, but you know how he gets when they blow a game, 83 00:05:20,752 --> 00:05:24,072 and he drinks too much and starts telling the truth. 84 00:05:24,152 --> 00:05:27,512 You gotta get a divorce from Wayne, Shelly. Why should I? 85 00:05:28,872 --> 00:05:31,832 Why? Because, Shelly, if my parents find out... 86 00:05:31,912 --> 00:05:34,832 that I'm married to a married man, you know they're gonna have a cow. 87 00:05:34,912 --> 00:05:37,992 You were supposed to be my best friend, Cindy. 88 00:05:38,072 --> 00:05:41,512 I am your best friend, Shelly. Wayne was my husband. 89 00:05:41,592 --> 00:05:45,592 Yeah, and you left him high and dry with that big shot astronaut, 90 00:05:45,632 --> 00:05:48,632 and now you're shacking up with someone else anyway. 91 00:05:48,672 --> 00:05:52,392 So? You didn't even come to my wedding party, Shelly. 92 00:05:52,472 --> 00:05:55,792 We had four kegs and a band, and you didn't even come. 93 00:05:55,872 --> 00:05:58,872 I had too much to do. 94 00:05:58,952 --> 00:06:00,832 So what am I supposed to do? 95 00:06:00,912 --> 00:06:03,312 Live in sin. I do. 96 00:06:10,912 --> 00:06:13,912 I know there were some Tic Tacs in here. 97 00:06:13,992 --> 00:06:17,112 Fleischman, if you could just get off your butt. 98 00:06:17,192 --> 00:06:19,392 Human beings are supposed to eat, O'Connell. 99 00:06:19,472 --> 00:06:22,872 The body is like a furnace. No fuel, no energy, ergo, no life. 100 00:06:22,952 --> 00:06:25,112 Well, try some of that Eskimo candy. 101 00:06:25,152 --> 00:06:27,552 That is by no stretch of the imagination candy. 102 00:06:27,632 --> 00:06:30,952 That is dried salmon pieces, and it's disgusting, okay? 103 00:06:31,032 --> 00:06:32,872 Fine. Starve then. 104 00:06:32,952 --> 00:06:34,272 Ow! Careful. 105 00:06:34,352 --> 00:06:37,312 Fleischman, could you try not to put your feet through the tent? 106 00:06:37,392 --> 00:06:39,792 Do you think you can try and do that, please? 107 00:06:39,872 --> 00:06:41,712 What is this made of? Nylon. 108 00:06:41,792 --> 00:06:44,192 This is nothing. This is supposed to protect us from the elements? 109 00:06:44,272 --> 00:06:46,872 If this protects us from one element, we'll be lucky. 110 00:06:46,912 --> 00:06:49,832 This is all-weather nylon. State of the art. 111 00:06:49,912 --> 00:06:51,752 Now, would you hand me the "B'"pole? 112 00:06:51,832 --> 00:06:54,472 To a bear, this would be like gift wrapping. 113 00:06:54,552 --> 00:06:57,032 How do you tell a "B" pole from an "A" pole? 114 00:06:57,112 --> 00:07:00,992 Fleischman, this urban act of yours doesn't play in the wilderness. 115 00:07:01,072 --> 00:07:03,352 So if you have any interest in survival, 116 00:07:03,432 --> 00:07:07,112 you're gonna have to drop the witty banter and hand me the damn pole. 117 00:07:07,192 --> 00:07:10,632 Thank you, Captain Bligh of the Yukon. Let's get one thing straight, O'Connell. 118 00:07:10,712 --> 00:07:13,552 The wilderness is not exactly my cup of tea. 119 00:07:13,632 --> 00:07:17,232 I do not seek wilderness, nor do I enjoy being trapped out here in the middle of it. 120 00:07:17,312 --> 00:07:19,672 I do not enjoy being trapped out here in this entire Alaska! 121 00:07:19,712 --> 00:07:21,632 I'm being forced to remain here against my will, 122 00:07:21,672 --> 00:07:23,512 against every fiber in my entire being. 123 00:07:23,592 --> 00:07:27,192 So the least you can do, if we're gonna be stuck out here together, is try and be a little civil. 124 00:07:27,232 --> 00:07:29,152 Okay. Good. 125 00:07:29,232 --> 00:07:31,992 Now which-which-which pole? 126 00:07:32,072 --> 00:07:33,912 The gold one. 127 00:07:33,992 --> 00:07:35,912 And, uh, two coffees. 128 00:07:35,992 --> 00:07:38,712 Is that it? Yeah. 129 00:07:46,032 --> 00:07:49,032 I took the liberty of fixing you a salmon patty plate. 130 00:07:49,112 --> 00:07:52,992 I figured you might want something more than coffee after such a long drive. 131 00:07:53,072 --> 00:07:54,912 Thanks. 132 00:07:54,992 --> 00:07:58,752 I'm Holling Vincoeur, Shelly's... man. 133 00:08:00,512 --> 00:08:03,192 I'm Cindy. It's a pleasure to meet you, Cindy. 134 00:08:03,272 --> 00:08:05,552 May I sit down? Sure. Take a load off. 135 00:08:09,352 --> 00:08:11,392 Wow. You are old. 136 00:08:11,472 --> 00:08:13,872 I mean, Wayne said you were old, but- 137 00:08:13,952 --> 00:08:16,032 How old are you? 138 00:08:17,392 --> 00:08:19,712 Uh, well, Cindy, I'm 63. 139 00:08:19,792 --> 00:08:22,912 Wow. I'm sorry about Shelly. 140 00:08:22,992 --> 00:08:24,912 She didn't really mean anything by it. 141 00:08:24,952 --> 00:08:28,072 She can get real stubborn when she sets her jaw. 142 00:08:28,152 --> 00:08:32,352 She's real P.O.'d at me, isn't she? Well, she's pretty possessive when it comes to men. 143 00:08:32,432 --> 00:08:34,272 How do you think I feel? 144 00:08:34,352 --> 00:08:36,472 Cindy doesn't mind taking Shelly's sloppy seconds. 145 00:08:36,512 --> 00:08:38,392 Cindy doesn't mind picking up her strays. 146 00:08:38,432 --> 00:08:40,872 I get the guy one time. One time! 147 00:08:40,952 --> 00:08:43,872 Not to mention the fact that she didn't even want Wayne anymore, 148 00:08:43,952 --> 00:08:47,672 which I suppose technically makes him another sloppy seconds as far as my track record is concerned, 149 00:08:47,712 --> 00:08:51,512 but do you see me getting all hot and sweaty under the brassiere because of it? 150 00:08:51,552 --> 00:08:53,912 - Uh, well- - How do your folks feel... 151 00:08:53,992 --> 00:08:56,712 about the two of you shacking up without a license? 152 00:08:56,792 --> 00:08:58,632 My parents? Yeah. Mm-hmm. 153 00:08:58,712 --> 00:09:01,152 - You mean about us not being married? - Mm-hmm. 154 00:09:01,232 --> 00:09:04,152 Well, that's not really much of a problem. 155 00:09:04,232 --> 00:09:07,152 - How come? - They're dead. 156 00:09:09,032 --> 00:09:10,512 Bummer. 157 00:09:10,592 --> 00:09:15,112 Well, my dad is this hard-line Sergeant Rock-type dude, 158 00:09:15,192 --> 00:09:17,392 and my mom's practically a Holy Roller. 159 00:09:17,472 --> 00:09:20,712 Boy, when they find out Wayne is a watchamacallit- 160 00:09:20,792 --> 00:09:24,272 A bigamist? No, not that. 161 00:09:24,312 --> 00:09:28,072 I mean one of those guys that's married to two chicks at the same time. 162 00:09:28,152 --> 00:09:32,392 I can tell you- there aren't gonna be any more Sunday dinners at Mom's trailer. 163 00:09:33,912 --> 00:09:38,912 Well, Cindy, maybe you and Wayne could get divorced, 164 00:09:38,992 --> 00:09:42,232 and then, when Shelly calms down and starts looking at things differently, 165 00:09:42,272 --> 00:09:44,672 she and Wayne will get divorced, and you two can get married. 166 00:09:44,752 --> 00:09:48,832 No way. I don't care if I ever see that snake in the grass again as long as I live. 167 00:09:48,912 --> 00:09:50,952 I don't care ifhe is cuter than hell. 168 00:09:51,032 --> 00:09:55,312 I left him high and dry at the 7-11 and took off in his truck. 169 00:09:55,392 --> 00:09:59,352 Got his lucky stick too. It's aluminum. 170 00:09:59,432 --> 00:10:01,592 You know, like Gretzky. 171 00:10:01,672 --> 00:10:05,432 Winter's closing in on us. 172 00:10:08,632 --> 00:10:11,192 Come on under here, and let me warm you up. 173 00:10:11,272 --> 00:10:13,112 I'm fat. 174 00:10:13,152 --> 00:10:17,672 Shelly, you are anything but fat. 175 00:10:18,872 --> 00:10:22,232 Look at me, Holling. I'm as thick as a tree. 176 00:10:22,312 --> 00:10:25,392 - Where? - Right here. See? 177 00:10:25,472 --> 00:10:27,472 I'm thickening. 178 00:10:28,832 --> 00:10:33,512 Cindy used to be thick. And big as a house. 179 00:10:33,592 --> 00:10:38,232 She thinks she's so great, traveling around Canada with Wayne and the team. 180 00:10:38,312 --> 00:10:41,712 Like she was on tour with Whitesnake or Metallica or somebody. 181 00:10:41,792 --> 00:10:45,992 I was the one who used to travel with the team and watch Wayne play hockey, Holling. 182 00:10:46,072 --> 00:10:48,432 I know that, honey. 183 00:10:48,512 --> 00:10:53,112 I was the girl all the guys wanted to grope when they got gassed after the game. 184 00:10:53,192 --> 00:10:55,992 I know. I was the one who drove 'em crazy... 185 00:10:56,072 --> 00:10:58,672 when I sat in the stands wearing spandex and leather. 186 00:10:58,712 --> 00:11:01,632 I was the girl they wanted to paw. Not Cindy. Me. 187 00:11:01,712 --> 00:11:04,472 Now Cindy's riding on the team bus... 188 00:11:04,512 --> 00:11:06,512 and staying in motels. 189 00:11:06,592 --> 00:11:09,672 Sometimes even hotels where they have room service. 190 00:11:09,752 --> 00:11:13,992 She's the one driving the boys crazy with her skinny little thighs... 191 00:11:14,072 --> 00:11:16,792 and practically no waist. 192 00:11:18,992 --> 00:11:21,752 And I'm stuck here... 193 00:11:21,792 --> 00:11:24,352 thickening. 194 00:11:30,152 --> 00:11:34,112 - What was that? - A wolf. 195 00:11:34,192 --> 00:11:36,592 Oh, God. Oh, Fleischman. 196 00:11:36,672 --> 00:11:40,552 In the entire history of the Northwest, there's never been a recorded incident... 197 00:11:40,632 --> 00:11:43,032 of a man being attacked by a wolf. 198 00:11:43,112 --> 00:11:46,712 It happens all the time in Russian novels. Especially to newlyweds. 199 00:11:46,792 --> 00:11:50,792 They leave the wedding in a sled and are immediately set upon by packs of voracious wolves. 200 00:11:50,872 --> 00:11:53,552 Get some sleep, Fleischman. 201 00:11:53,632 --> 00:11:56,792 What about bears? Or wolverines? 202 00:11:56,832 --> 00:11:59,312 What are wolverines anyways? 203 00:11:59,392 --> 00:12:02,592 Are they little wolves that swarm all over you and nibble you to death? 204 00:12:02,672 --> 00:12:04,512 Sleep. 205 00:12:15,232 --> 00:12:17,872 Not to put too fine a point on it, O'Connell, 206 00:12:17,952 --> 00:12:21,432 but has it occurred to you there might be certain romantic implications... 207 00:12:21,472 --> 00:12:24,472 to us being stranded out here in the middle of nowhere? 208 00:12:24,552 --> 00:12:26,712 In your dreams, Fleischman. 209 00:12:35,512 --> 00:12:38,792 Five thousand some odd years of recorded history, 210 00:12:38,872 --> 00:12:43,712 centuries of thought and planning, trial and error, research and development. 211 00:12:43,792 --> 00:12:47,032 Finally, indoor plumbing is perfected, and in one fell swoop, 212 00:12:47,072 --> 00:12:50,192 I'm reduced to squatting in the woods like a German shepherd. 213 00:12:50,272 --> 00:12:52,112 Would you hand me the socket wrench? 214 00:12:52,192 --> 00:12:54,312 Socket wrench. 215 00:12:55,872 --> 00:12:58,232 I mean, to not even flush. To just stand up and walk away. 216 00:12:58,312 --> 00:13:01,432 There's no sense of completion. How's it coming? 217 00:13:01,472 --> 00:13:04,632 I don't know. I thought it was the carburetor, but I don't see anything wrong. 218 00:13:04,672 --> 00:13:06,872 Well, that thing there looks loose. This thing? 219 00:13:06,912 --> 00:13:10,272 - Maybe if you tightened it. - You think I should tighten it? 220 00:13:10,352 --> 00:13:13,952 - Yeah. - Fleischman, this thing is called the butterfly. 221 00:13:14,032 --> 00:13:16,512 It controls the mixture of the air and the gasoline. 222 00:13:16,592 --> 00:13:20,192 If I were to tighten it, as you suggest, then there would be no air at all. 223 00:13:20,272 --> 00:13:23,032 - And that's no good? - Fleischman, I'm trying to accomplish something here. 224 00:13:23,072 --> 00:13:25,472 Move. 225 00:13:25,552 --> 00:13:28,432 Well, when you are done there, I have a surprise for you. 226 00:13:28,512 --> 00:13:31,752 Oh, yeah? What's that? Something for breakfast besides seal blubber. 227 00:13:31,832 --> 00:13:34,392 No, thanks. 228 00:13:34,472 --> 00:13:36,952 I found them while I was relieving myself out there. 229 00:13:37,032 --> 00:13:39,872 They're quite tasty. Try one. 230 00:13:39,952 --> 00:13:42,072 No, thanks. Do you know what those are, Fleischman? 231 00:13:42,112 --> 00:13:44,512 Berries. What kind of berries? 232 00:13:44,592 --> 00:13:46,152 Blueberries. Red blueberries? 233 00:13:48,832 --> 00:13:51,192 - Yeah. What are they? - Baneberries. 234 00:13:51,232 --> 00:13:54,432 - Baneberries? Are they poisonous? - Only if you eat enough of them. 235 00:13:54,512 --> 00:13:58,712 Then I give you four, five minutes, tops. 236 00:14:07,152 --> 00:14:11,232 Excuse me. You don't happen to carry any high-humidity mousse? 237 00:14:11,312 --> 00:14:13,792 - Mousse? - You know, like a styling gel. 238 00:14:13,872 --> 00:14:15,792 Oh, no. I'm sorry, dear. 239 00:14:15,872 --> 00:14:19,032 But I do have a can of this ozone-depleting spray. 240 00:14:19,112 --> 00:14:21,432 Hmm. My hair's real tricky. 241 00:14:21,472 --> 00:14:23,672 You just look at it wrong, it lays down and dies. 242 00:14:23,752 --> 00:14:25,592 I think it looks perfectly fine. 243 00:14:25,632 --> 00:14:28,392 - It's not what you got. It's what you do with it. - I like that. 244 00:14:28,472 --> 00:14:31,152 - You've got nice hair. - Thank you. 245 00:14:31,232 --> 00:14:34,072 Is it fussy? I don't think so. 246 00:14:34,112 --> 00:14:36,832 - The cut's all wrong. - Oh? 247 00:14:36,912 --> 00:14:40,632 You're an oval, like Debbie Gibson. You need some fullness and height... 248 00:14:40,712 --> 00:14:43,552 to shorten the length of your face and accent your cheekbones. 249 00:14:43,632 --> 00:14:46,232 Oh, really? Cut like so. 250 00:14:46,312 --> 00:14:48,952 Light body perm. Maybe a mahogany highlight. 251 00:14:49,032 --> 00:14:51,952 Don't you think that would do a lot for her? 252 00:14:51,992 --> 00:14:55,192 Oh, that-that looks pretty good. Are you-You're a professional? 253 00:14:55,232 --> 00:14:58,032 Mm-hmm. I have a degree from the Saskatchewan College of Applied Arts. 254 00:14:58,112 --> 00:15:00,872 - You know it? - Uh, I don't think so. Uh-uh. 255 00:15:00,952 --> 00:15:03,912 Well, I majored in hair, and I had a minor in base application. 256 00:15:03,992 --> 00:15:06,072 You know, with you, I wouldn't touch a thing. 257 00:15:06,152 --> 00:15:09,792 It fits his bone structure, frames his face. Like Chris Robinson. 258 00:15:11,272 --> 00:15:14,072 Chris Robinson, Black Crowes. 259 00:15:14,152 --> 00:15:17,512 "Shake Your Moneymaker"? "Hard to Handle"? 260 00:15:19,792 --> 00:15:21,592 I can't. I just- I can't. 261 00:15:23,272 --> 00:15:27,272 Fleischman, you eat sushi. Not walrus sushi, I don't. 262 00:15:27,352 --> 00:15:29,192 If I cooked that, it would turn to oil. 263 00:15:29,272 --> 00:15:32,232 It'd by like eating Crisco, solid butter, a huge hunk of shmalts. 264 00:15:33,872 --> 00:15:38,392 Chicken fat. Jewish mayo. You spread it on bread and die of a heart attack by the time you're 50. 265 00:15:38,432 --> 00:15:42,712 For your information, Fleischman, the fat and blubber found in Arctic fish and maritime mammals... 266 00:15:42,792 --> 00:15:47,112 is completely chemically different than that found in hamburgers, potato chips and Jewish mayo. 267 00:15:47,192 --> 00:15:50,952 In fact, it may actually help the Eskimo fight heart disease and other southern afflictions. 268 00:15:51,032 --> 00:15:53,592 Look at it. It's just lying there. 269 00:15:53,672 --> 00:15:56,912 Eat the spotted seal liver. You can cook that. 270 00:15:56,952 --> 00:15:59,432 I can't. I just- I can't. 271 00:15:59,512 --> 00:16:01,552 Okay. 272 00:16:01,632 --> 00:16:03,992 Okay? What okay? 273 00:16:04,032 --> 00:16:07,032 Let's go. 274 00:16:07,112 --> 00:16:08,832 Go? Go where? 275 00:16:08,912 --> 00:16:10,912 Look around. Look around for what? 276 00:16:10,992 --> 00:16:13,672 Well, water, for one thing. We're almost completely out. 277 00:16:13,752 --> 00:16:15,832 You're walking into those woods? You don't know what's out there. 278 00:16:15,912 --> 00:16:19,512 I have a gun. They don't know that. They see us walking around there, 279 00:16:19,592 --> 00:16:21,632 they think we're with the Sierra Club and that's a stick. 280 00:16:21,712 --> 00:16:23,352 - Who's they? - I don't know. 281 00:16:23,432 --> 00:16:25,592 Wild animals. White supremacists. Attack bugs. 282 00:16:25,672 --> 00:16:28,072 You're right, Fleischman. You stay here. 283 00:16:28,152 --> 00:16:31,352 Wait. Wait! 284 00:16:31,432 --> 00:16:33,992 What if something unforeseen should happen? 285 00:16:34,072 --> 00:16:35,952 Like what? I don't know. 286 00:16:36,032 --> 00:16:39,072 Say, a moose with an attitude. 287 00:16:39,152 --> 00:16:41,912 You're absolutely right, Fleischman. You're right. 288 00:16:41,952 --> 00:16:43,832 I am? 289 00:16:46,872 --> 00:16:48,872 Here's a gun. What am I supposed to do with it? 290 00:16:48,952 --> 00:16:50,792 Shoot the moose. 291 00:16:50,872 --> 00:16:53,632 Point of information, O'Connell: I don't know how to fire a gun. 292 00:16:53,712 --> 00:16:56,352 I don't know anything about guns. 293 00:16:57,592 --> 00:16:59,552 Look. 294 00:16:59,632 --> 00:17:03,352 This is the safety. Take this off, aim and fire. 295 00:17:15,112 --> 00:17:16,912 Here's a whistle. 296 00:17:16,952 --> 00:17:20,472 If you need anything, just blow. I'll come. Hopefully, I'll be within range. 297 00:17:20,552 --> 00:17:23,352 Oh, I'll blow hard. I'm sure you will. 298 00:17:25,792 --> 00:17:29,872 Now see how I do? I "shover" my fingers right down into the hair. 299 00:17:29,952 --> 00:17:32,632 And up. Shovering and up. 300 00:17:32,672 --> 00:17:36,112 Shovering and up. "Balloonifying" the hair. 301 00:17:36,152 --> 00:17:39,672 Shovering and balloonifying. Shovering and balloonifying. 302 00:17:39,752 --> 00:17:41,752 See the body coming in? 303 00:17:41,832 --> 00:17:43,912 Well, will you look at that. 304 00:17:43,992 --> 00:17:46,632 Did I tell you that I'm the official hairstylist for the Seals? 305 00:17:46,712 --> 00:17:48,952 - No. - Wayne's hockey team. 306 00:17:49,032 --> 00:17:53,032 They're all really into rap. So we started off with perms and buzzed sides. 307 00:17:53,112 --> 00:17:54,952 Except for Wayne. He's the Ice Man. 308 00:17:55,032 --> 00:17:57,712 Then they hit this eight-game losing streak. 309 00:17:57,792 --> 00:18:00,832 I knew it was time to make a statement, so I carved 'em. 310 00:18:00,912 --> 00:18:03,752 Carved their what, dear? Their scalps. 311 00:18:03,832 --> 00:18:05,672 She razor wrote. 312 00:18:05,752 --> 00:18:08,312 And I wrote boldly too... 313 00:18:08,392 --> 00:18:12,272 until the league censors got wind of it and started spot-checking their heads before each game. 314 00:18:12,352 --> 00:18:15,312 I'll see you later. Bye, Ed. 315 00:18:16,592 --> 00:18:18,672 Hi, Shelly. Ed, what's going on? 316 00:18:18,712 --> 00:18:21,072 Cindy's giving Ruth-Anne a makeover. 317 00:18:23,512 --> 00:18:25,472 Two gallons, not one. 318 00:18:25,552 --> 00:18:28,912 You got it. No, not that way. Over there. 319 00:18:30,312 --> 00:18:32,352 Frank, how are ya? 320 00:18:34,872 --> 00:18:37,472 � Tiene esta camisa en azul? 321 00:18:37,552 --> 00:18:41,112 Do you have the shirt in blue? Now you try. 322 00:18:41,152 --> 00:18:44,672 � Tiene esta camisa en azul? 323 00:18:44,752 --> 00:18:48,432 � Tiene usted mi tama�o en verde? 324 00:18:48,472 --> 00:18:50,672 Do you have my size in green? 325 00:18:50,712 --> 00:18:54,592 Repeat. � Tiene usted mi tama�o en verde? 326 00:18:54,672 --> 00:18:58,912 � Tiene usted mi tama�o en verde? 327 00:18:58,992 --> 00:19:02,232 Very good. Muy bien. 328 00:19:02,272 --> 00:19:06,032 Now let us cross to the musical portion of our lesson. 329 00:19:06,072 --> 00:19:07,992 Be sure to sing along. 330 00:19:41,112 --> 00:19:44,432 God. Oh, God. 331 00:19:51,512 --> 00:19:54,832 What? What is it? What? What? What happened? What? 332 00:19:54,912 --> 00:19:58,072 O'Connell. Thank God it's you. 333 00:19:58,152 --> 00:20:01,032 - What's wrong? - I thought you were a bear. 334 00:20:01,112 --> 00:20:03,952 A bear? You thought I was a bear? 335 00:20:04,032 --> 00:20:07,352 You know, you might as well just have called every wild animal in the neighborhood. 336 00:20:07,392 --> 00:20:09,992 You should've just sent an engraved invitation: 337 00:20:10,072 --> 00:20:12,792 "Come eat us. No R.S.V.P. necessary." 338 00:20:14,912 --> 00:20:17,752 Bear. You thought I was a bear.! 339 00:20:21,872 --> 00:20:25,992 Most people think Vaseline's just for sex, but it's got lots more uses. 340 00:20:26,072 --> 00:20:28,792 Dry skin. Also the lips. 341 00:20:28,872 --> 00:20:31,792 If you rub a little bit into your nails every night before you go to bed, 342 00:20:31,872 --> 00:20:33,912 you'll never have a problem with cuticles. 343 00:20:33,992 --> 00:20:35,832 Okay. And also... 344 00:20:35,912 --> 00:20:38,832 if you put a couple of drops on a toothbrush, you can groom your eyebrows. 345 00:20:38,912 --> 00:20:41,112 Even comb them upward for a more glamorous look. 346 00:20:41,192 --> 00:20:44,472 You've got great eyebrows. Sort of like Paula Abdul. 347 00:20:44,552 --> 00:20:47,592 Okay. What do you think? 348 00:20:47,672 --> 00:20:50,992 They look nice. What do you think you're doing? 349 00:20:51,072 --> 00:20:52,672 I'm giving Marilyn a "mani." 350 00:20:52,752 --> 00:20:56,112 Yeah? Well, it's against health codes, so cut it out. 351 00:20:58,552 --> 00:21:01,992 Shelly! I drive up here almost 2,000 miles! 352 00:21:02,072 --> 00:21:05,832 Who asked you to? And all you can talk about is health codes! 353 00:21:05,912 --> 00:21:09,352 If you don't mind, I am trying to pee! 354 00:21:09,432 --> 00:21:13,352 What's your problem, Shelly? You've had a bug up your butt since I got here! 355 00:21:13,432 --> 00:21:15,512 I'm mad, okay? What? 356 00:21:15,592 --> 00:21:19,192 All right. You wanna know why I've got a bug up my butt? 357 00:21:19,272 --> 00:21:23,992 It's because I'm mad! M-A-D! Mad! 358 00:21:24,072 --> 00:21:27,512 At me? You see anybody else in here to be mad at? 359 00:21:27,592 --> 00:21:32,352 Why? You come prancin' up here, and you don't even call to warn me you're coming, 360 00:21:32,432 --> 00:21:36,592 and you don't even hardly look like you, with your hair and your tight little buns, 361 00:21:36,632 --> 00:21:40,072 and you make me feel like I don't even look like me anymore! 362 00:21:42,352 --> 00:21:44,672 Hello? 363 00:21:44,752 --> 00:21:48,712 We're busy. Shelly? Cindy? 364 00:21:48,792 --> 00:21:51,592 Are you gals in there? 365 00:21:51,672 --> 00:21:53,792 Go away, Holling. 366 00:21:53,872 --> 00:21:58,072 Uh, there's a telephone call for Cindy. 367 00:21:58,112 --> 00:22:02,712 - For me? From who? - Well, it's, uh- it's Wayne. 368 00:22:02,792 --> 00:22:06,392 Tell him we're taking a pee! 369 00:22:06,432 --> 00:22:08,512 Okay. And, Holling, 370 00:22:08,592 --> 00:22:10,992 we need more T.P. in stall two. 371 00:22:11,072 --> 00:22:12,952 Okay. 372 00:22:16,392 --> 00:22:21,232 You know, Shel, growing up, you were the girl that had it all. 373 00:22:21,272 --> 00:22:24,992 "D" cup, 17-inch thighs, 374 00:22:25,072 --> 00:22:29,272 perfect knees, teeth, nose. 375 00:22:29,352 --> 00:22:33,112 You were Saskatchewan's answer to perfection. 376 00:22:33,192 --> 00:22:37,592 I know. It was really hard being your best friend, Shelly. 377 00:22:38,952 --> 00:22:40,792 Why? 378 00:22:40,872 --> 00:22:44,712 'Cause I was always second-best. Second-best Cindy. 379 00:22:44,792 --> 00:22:48,072 Well, you made better grades than me, Cin. 380 00:22:48,152 --> 00:22:50,912 Yeah, sure. I made better grades, 381 00:22:50,992 --> 00:22:54,232 unless the teacher was a guy who had the hots for you. 382 00:22:54,312 --> 00:22:57,992 I know. I went on to higher education, and I know that means a lot. 383 00:22:58,072 --> 00:23:00,952 But do you have any idea how much pain... 384 00:23:01,032 --> 00:23:03,912 your perfect bottom put me through? 385 00:23:03,992 --> 00:23:08,552 - I swear, Cin. I had no idea. - You couldn't read the signs? 386 00:23:09,672 --> 00:23:14,512 Look, I admit life has dealt me a royal straight flush, 387 00:23:14,552 --> 00:23:17,752 but it hasn't been all perfect. 388 00:23:20,552 --> 00:23:24,712 - With perfection comes responsibility. - What do you mean? 389 00:23:24,792 --> 00:23:29,232 Do you think it was easy living up to your and everybody else's expectations? 390 00:23:29,312 --> 00:23:33,872 Always havin'to look bitchin', walk bitchin', dress bitchin'. 391 00:23:33,912 --> 00:23:36,592 Are my jeans too tight? Are they not tight enough? 392 00:23:36,632 --> 00:23:38,872 Do my earrings and eyeliner match? 393 00:23:38,912 --> 00:23:40,912 Do my boobs bounce enough but not too much? 394 00:23:40,992 --> 00:23:44,312 Are my boots as white as my teeth? I mean, I had to set the example. 395 00:23:44,392 --> 00:23:48,152 And let me tell you- being perfect really takes its toll. 396 00:23:48,232 --> 00:23:50,392 I never thought of it like that. 397 00:23:50,472 --> 00:23:52,712 Nobody did. 398 00:23:52,792 --> 00:23:55,952 Nobody ever thought to take time to think, 399 00:23:55,992 --> 00:23:59,712 "What about Shelly? Is she all right? 400 00:23:59,792 --> 00:24:03,672 Can she carry it all on her perfect shoulders?" 401 00:24:06,032 --> 00:24:08,952 Being perfect, Cin, 402 00:24:09,032 --> 00:24:11,872 is not all beer and roses. 403 00:24:13,952 --> 00:24:15,872 Aw, Shel. 404 00:24:17,592 --> 00:24:20,152 I'm sorry. 405 00:24:20,232 --> 00:24:22,832 I'm hungry. The children are hungry. 406 00:24:22,872 --> 00:24:26,832 We haven't had anything to eat but boiled tree leaves for the past three months. 407 00:24:26,912 --> 00:24:29,392 Just one more second. 408 00:24:29,432 --> 00:24:33,432 I'm in this cave- this cave surrounded by mastodons- and I'm eating bark. 409 00:24:33,472 --> 00:24:36,472 - Okay. It's done. - What is that supposed to be? 410 00:24:36,552 --> 00:24:39,632 - That's a hamburger. - That is not a hamburger, Fleischman. 411 00:24:39,672 --> 00:24:42,392 The bun is too big. There are no sesame seeds. 412 00:24:42,472 --> 00:24:44,872 And would you mind telling me where the sliced onions are? 413 00:24:44,952 --> 00:24:47,512 - l-I forgot. - I should have married the stud with the big club. 414 00:24:47,552 --> 00:24:49,432 He was crazy about me. 415 00:24:49,472 --> 00:24:52,432 Oh, the guy with the huge quads and the sloping forehead? 416 00:24:52,512 --> 00:24:55,312 Yeah, well, at least he put a stegosaurus on the table every night. 417 00:24:55,352 --> 00:24:57,152 I'm just no good at killing. 418 00:25:01,752 --> 00:25:04,992 Okay, will you take her? Thank you. 419 00:25:06,552 --> 00:25:10,032 Okay, so you're a lousy killer. 420 00:25:10,112 --> 00:25:12,672 The truth of it is... 421 00:25:12,752 --> 00:25:17,472 I didn't have all these little mini Magnons with you because of your slaying power. 422 00:25:17,552 --> 00:25:19,792 No? Mm-mmm. 423 00:25:19,832 --> 00:25:22,112 Don't you get it? 424 00:25:22,192 --> 00:25:24,032 What? 425 00:25:24,112 --> 00:25:27,112 I don't care if I ever have saut�ed iguana again, 426 00:25:27,192 --> 00:25:29,032 as long as- 427 00:25:30,752 --> 00:25:33,632 What? Well, you know. 428 00:25:49,152 --> 00:25:51,512 Hey. 429 00:25:51,592 --> 00:25:55,352 - Hope I'm not disturbing you. - No. Uh, what are you doing out this late, Holling? 430 00:25:55,392 --> 00:26:00,632 - Oh, just walking. - Something on your mind, Holling? 431 00:26:00,712 --> 00:26:04,792 With me? No, nothing. Just... nothing, really. 432 00:26:06,712 --> 00:26:11,352 Chris, do you ever think anything about me and, uh, Shelly? 433 00:26:11,432 --> 00:26:13,832 You're some of my favorite people, Holling. You know that. 434 00:26:13,912 --> 00:26:17,752 No, not that. I mean about the difference in our ages. 435 00:26:17,832 --> 00:26:20,952 You mean, like, uh, you're old enough to be her grandfather? 436 00:26:20,992 --> 00:26:23,272 Yeah. 437 00:26:23,352 --> 00:26:25,312 - You ever think about that? - No. 438 00:26:25,392 --> 00:26:28,592 I'm 63 years old, Chris, 439 00:26:28,632 --> 00:26:32,192 way more than 40 years older than Shelly, 440 00:26:32,272 --> 00:26:36,352 and what with the longevity of the males in my family, 441 00:26:36,432 --> 00:26:39,512 I never really gave it much consideration as far as a problem. 442 00:26:39,592 --> 00:26:42,712 Problem? Unless fate intervenes, you're gonna be keeping Shelly company a good long time. 443 00:26:42,752 --> 00:26:45,912 Yeah. It's just that... 444 00:26:47,912 --> 00:26:53,512 lately I've been seeing Shelly in a different light. 445 00:26:53,592 --> 00:26:58,752 And, uh, to tell you the truth, I've started to wonder... 446 00:26:58,832 --> 00:27:04,392 if there isn't something unseemly about our love. 447 00:27:05,632 --> 00:27:07,552 I don't think it's unseemly, Holling. 448 00:27:07,632 --> 00:27:11,832 - No? Really, Chris? You don't? - No, I don't. 449 00:27:11,872 --> 00:27:15,912 I mean, personally, I don't believe in chronological age for one thing, Holling, 450 00:27:15,992 --> 00:27:20,512 and for another, Shelly could have an old soul, and you could have a young soul. 451 00:27:20,592 --> 00:27:22,912 In fact, she could be much older than you. 452 00:27:22,992 --> 00:27:26,312 You know, history's crawling with May-December romances. 453 00:27:26,392 --> 00:27:28,912 Strom Thurmond. Guy's a U.S. senator. 454 00:27:28,952 --> 00:27:32,192 Uh, Supreme CourtJustice William O. Douglas. 455 00:27:32,272 --> 00:27:36,032 Charlie Chaplin, Fred Astaire, uh, Jerry Lee Lewis. 456 00:27:36,112 --> 00:27:39,392 - The Nutty Professor. - No, Jerry Lee Lewis. "Great Balls of Fire"? 457 00:27:39,472 --> 00:27:42,072 Oh, yeah. You mean- 458 00:27:42,152 --> 00:27:43,832 - Right. - Yeah. 459 00:27:43,872 --> 00:27:45,832 His wife was 13. 460 00:27:47,272 --> 00:27:49,112 Thirteen? 461 00:27:50,872 --> 00:27:54,392 I don't know. The hoses are intact. 462 00:27:54,472 --> 00:27:57,792 The carburetor's fine. The spark plugs check out. 463 00:27:57,872 --> 00:27:59,992 I thought you said it was the engine. 464 00:28:00,032 --> 00:28:04,072 Well, it probably is, but, you know, it could be a bearing. 465 00:28:04,152 --> 00:28:07,272 It could be a blown gasket. But there's no oil. 466 00:28:07,352 --> 00:28:10,272 You know, I was just hoping it was something fixable. 467 00:28:10,352 --> 00:28:12,192 It could be a ring job, 468 00:28:12,272 --> 00:28:14,832 but I'm not prepared to do that in the middle of the woods. 469 00:28:14,872 --> 00:28:16,752 A ring job? 470 00:28:16,792 --> 00:28:18,832 Forget it, Fleischman. 471 00:28:18,872 --> 00:28:21,112 This is the engine, right? 472 00:28:21,152 --> 00:28:23,152 Oh, Fleischman, please. 473 00:28:23,192 --> 00:28:25,072 Now, does this have valves? 474 00:28:25,112 --> 00:28:27,872 Well, of course it has valves. It's an engine. 475 00:28:27,952 --> 00:28:30,272 Just stop hovering, okay? 476 00:28:32,232 --> 00:28:35,512 What do you expect me to do, O'Connell? Stand idly by and starve to death? 477 00:28:35,592 --> 00:28:37,552 Your choice. 478 00:28:37,632 --> 00:28:40,272 I can't eat that stuff. I told you. I tried. 479 00:28:40,312 --> 00:28:42,832 The more I chewed, the bigger it got in my mouth. 480 00:28:42,912 --> 00:28:45,512 I'm not meant to eat blubber. I'm from New York City. 481 00:28:45,592 --> 00:28:48,432 People from New York City are not conditioned to eat blubber. 482 00:28:48,472 --> 00:28:51,192 Not spotted seal liver, not-not walrus fat, 483 00:28:51,232 --> 00:28:54,192 not dried fish shards and not- especially not blubber. 484 00:28:54,232 --> 00:28:56,152 That's it. I've had it. What? 485 00:28:56,232 --> 00:28:59,392 I am sick and tired of your blubbering about blubber! Sick and tired! Fed up to here! 486 00:28:59,472 --> 00:29:01,832 - What are you doing? - Going hunting. 487 00:29:01,912 --> 00:29:04,392 Hunting? Yes. I'm gonna kill us some meat. 488 00:29:04,472 --> 00:29:06,352 Meat? Really? Can you do that? 489 00:29:06,392 --> 00:29:09,232 Don't go anywhere near my plane. Don't touch a thing. 490 00:29:09,272 --> 00:29:11,632 Fine. No problem. And try to stay away from the fire. 491 00:29:11,672 --> 00:29:15,272 Can you not smother it this time? Huh? Do you think you can do that, Fleischman? 492 00:29:17,272 --> 00:29:19,152 Hey, Chris. 493 00:29:19,192 --> 00:29:21,272 Hey, Shel. How you doing? 494 00:29:21,352 --> 00:29:23,792 This is Cindy. She's my best friend from home. 495 00:29:23,872 --> 00:29:26,112 Really? Hi, Cindy. Nice to meet you. 496 00:29:26,192 --> 00:29:29,192 Hair's kinda stringy. Needs some body. 497 00:29:29,272 --> 00:29:32,312 Chris, I need to talk to you for a minute. 498 00:29:32,352 --> 00:29:34,232 Okay. What's up? 499 00:29:34,272 --> 00:29:37,632 Well, I've decided to get divorced. 500 00:29:37,712 --> 00:29:40,112 From Wayne. 501 00:29:40,152 --> 00:29:42,312 Oh. All right. 502 00:29:42,392 --> 00:29:46,632 And l-Well, we want you to perform the divorce. 503 00:29:46,712 --> 00:29:48,632 - Me? - Yeah. 504 00:29:48,712 --> 00:29:52,312 - Perform a divorce? - Yeah. 505 00:29:54,192 --> 00:29:57,472 - Uh, I can't. - Why not? 506 00:29:57,552 --> 00:30:02,952 Well, Shel, a divorce isn't performed. It's handled, you know, by a lawyer. 507 00:30:03,032 --> 00:30:05,072 But you do marriages. 508 00:30:05,152 --> 00:30:07,112 Yeah. 509 00:30:07,192 --> 00:30:11,512 So if you can glue two people together, how come you can't break 'em apart? 510 00:30:12,592 --> 00:30:15,072 Well, you know, it's not the same thing. 511 00:30:15,152 --> 00:30:19,472 Well, I know it isn't, but, um, it's not that different. 512 00:30:22,112 --> 00:30:25,952 - You're right. Okay. - Hey, all right! 513 00:30:27,432 --> 00:30:29,992 You haven't said anything, Fleischman, in a whole minute. 514 00:30:30,072 --> 00:30:32,152 It's beginning to give me the creeps. 515 00:30:32,232 --> 00:30:36,152 It's just- You know, that's a squirrel. 516 00:30:36,232 --> 00:30:39,632 I used to feed these things peanuts in the park. 517 00:30:39,672 --> 00:30:41,912 I made eye contact with squirrels. 518 00:30:41,992 --> 00:30:43,912 I love people like you. 519 00:30:43,992 --> 00:30:47,032 You'll eat meat and chicken, but get a little blood on your hands- 520 00:30:47,112 --> 00:30:50,752 Oh, I'm grateful. I am. I mean, I'm impressed. 521 00:30:50,832 --> 00:30:53,272 You said you were gonna get some meat. You went out in the woods. 522 00:30:53,352 --> 00:30:55,552 Came back with some meat. 523 00:30:55,632 --> 00:30:58,632 Is that a compliment or some sort of trick? 524 00:30:58,712 --> 00:31:02,232 No. l-I could've lived without the part where you skinned it. 525 00:31:02,272 --> 00:31:07,632 It's like you were taking a little fur jacket off of a tiny baby. 526 00:31:07,712 --> 00:31:10,872 You know, it is kind of like a baby's jacket. 527 00:31:10,952 --> 00:31:12,792 But without the zipper. 528 00:31:12,872 --> 00:31:16,632 You were pretty deft with that knife. Remind me not to aggravate you when you're armed. 529 00:31:19,552 --> 00:31:21,912 That's startin' to smell pretty good, isn't it? 530 00:31:21,952 --> 00:31:24,232 Mm-hmm. Done yet? 531 00:31:24,312 --> 00:31:26,192 A few more minutes. 532 00:31:26,272 --> 00:31:31,152 I'm drooling. I'm salivating and drooling over a squirrel. 533 00:31:33,312 --> 00:31:36,152 I used to want to be a chef. Really? 534 00:31:36,192 --> 00:31:39,832 Mm-hmm. Well, not really a chef. More like a baker. 535 00:31:39,872 --> 00:31:43,592 But not desserts. Just bread. Really good bread. 536 00:31:43,672 --> 00:31:47,032 Baguettes, little rye currant rolls... 537 00:31:47,112 --> 00:31:50,072 like you get at the Poil�ne Bakery on the Rue de la Cherche Midi. 538 00:31:50,152 --> 00:31:52,392 In Paris. Mm. 539 00:31:52,472 --> 00:31:54,952 What happened? What do you mean, what happened? 540 00:31:55,032 --> 00:31:57,272 To-To being a baker. 541 00:31:59,112 --> 00:32:01,792 Oh, I don't know. Didn't you ever want to be something? 542 00:32:01,872 --> 00:32:06,232 Center fielder for the Yankees. Yes. Before Steinbrenner. 543 00:32:08,752 --> 00:32:13,192 You know, um, if they don't find us here, 544 00:32:13,272 --> 00:32:15,952 and, uh, we starve to death, 545 00:32:15,992 --> 00:32:18,272 I want you to know you can eat my body. 546 00:32:18,352 --> 00:32:21,032 Okay. Yeah, well, you don't have to agree that fast. 547 00:32:21,112 --> 00:32:25,312 I hope you at least wait till I'm dead before you start with your carving skills. 548 00:32:27,792 --> 00:32:29,632 What? 549 00:32:29,712 --> 00:32:31,552 Nothing. 550 00:32:33,352 --> 00:32:35,632 Well, I'm just beginning to think... 551 00:32:35,672 --> 00:32:37,952 maybe we shouldn't wait for someone to come and find us. 552 00:32:38,032 --> 00:32:40,312 I think after we eat, I'm gonna pack out east... 553 00:32:40,392 --> 00:32:43,192 and see if I can find a way for us to get out. 554 00:32:51,432 --> 00:32:54,072 Used to be when people took the marriage vow, 555 00:32:54,112 --> 00:32:56,712 "till death do us part" meant just that. 556 00:32:56,792 --> 00:32:59,512 But these days, as often as not, people take a look at each other... 557 00:32:59,592 --> 00:33:03,672 after a few years in the marital sack and say, "See you later, Jack." 558 00:33:03,712 --> 00:33:06,872 Maybe that's good. I mean, wolves mate for life, 559 00:33:06,952 --> 00:33:09,112 but the human species lives a lot longer. 560 00:33:09,152 --> 00:33:12,592 Maybe just too long to be hitched to the same post. So- 561 00:33:12,632 --> 00:33:17,232 The views of this deejay are not necessarily those of the owner of this station. 562 00:33:19,192 --> 00:33:22,352 Well, individual opinion aside, divorce looks like it's here to stay. 563 00:33:22,392 --> 00:33:26,672 So instead of seeing it as a failure or an end, 564 00:33:26,752 --> 00:33:30,672 why not celebrate divorce as the beginning of something? 565 00:33:30,712 --> 00:33:34,472 A fresh start. Another chance to step up to the big wheel and take another spin. 566 00:33:34,552 --> 00:33:36,392 Like Swami Bodhidharma says, 567 00:33:36,472 --> 00:33:39,472 "You can't really have a thing until you let it go. '" 568 00:33:39,552 --> 00:33:44,032 In other words, when things start to look really bad, 569 00:33:44,112 --> 00:33:48,112 why not step back and have another look at 'em? 570 00:33:48,152 --> 00:33:50,432 So we're here today to celebrate the divorce... 571 00:33:50,512 --> 00:33:54,072 of a young couple who probably got married a little too young, 572 00:33:54,152 --> 00:33:56,512 before they really knew what they were doing, 573 00:33:56,592 --> 00:33:58,472 and then realized they'd made a horrible mistake. 574 00:33:58,552 --> 00:34:00,872 Hey, Wayne, you still out there? Yeah, I'm here. 575 00:34:00,952 --> 00:34:04,632 We got WayneJones on the line here all the way from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan. 576 00:34:04,712 --> 00:34:07,192 Wayne's the starting left wing for the Saskatoon Seals. 577 00:34:07,272 --> 00:34:10,552 And in studio we have his soon-to-be ex-wife, Miss Shelly Tambo. 578 00:34:10,632 --> 00:34:12,592 Hey, Chris in the Morning? Yeah Wayne-o. 579 00:34:12,672 --> 00:34:16,312 You said I could say hey to the guys at Keticut Motor Oil? 580 00:34:16,352 --> 00:34:18,672 'Cause, you know, they sponsor the Seals. 581 00:34:18,712 --> 00:34:21,192 That's right, Wayne. Go ahead. Hey, guys. 582 00:34:21,272 --> 00:34:25,312 All right. Hey, Shel, you want to come up here and have a sit at the mike. 583 00:34:25,392 --> 00:34:29,552 Why don't you go ahead and say hi to the folks back home, Shel. 584 00:34:29,592 --> 00:34:32,792 Hi, everybody. 585 00:34:32,832 --> 00:34:35,032 Okay. 586 00:34:35,072 --> 00:34:37,632 Shelly, Wayne, 587 00:34:37,712 --> 00:34:40,432 you got married a couple of years ago, and it didn't work out. 588 00:34:40,472 --> 00:34:43,112 But that's okay, you know? You got your whole life ahead of you. 589 00:34:43,192 --> 00:34:46,072 You've found other people to hook up with. 590 00:34:46,152 --> 00:34:49,432 Wayne, is there anything you'd like to say to Shelly before I remove the cuffs? 591 00:34:49,512 --> 00:34:51,392 Shelly? Are you there? 592 00:34:51,472 --> 00:34:53,512 Yeah. I'm here. 593 00:34:53,592 --> 00:34:55,552 Are you sure about this? 594 00:34:55,632 --> 00:34:58,232 Of course I am. Don't be stupid, Wayne. 595 00:34:58,312 --> 00:35:02,752 Anyway, you already went and got married again, so what difference does it make? 596 00:35:02,832 --> 00:35:05,512 You just better be nicer to Cindy than you were to me. 597 00:35:05,592 --> 00:35:08,832 Okay. Cindy? Cindy, you there? 598 00:35:08,912 --> 00:35:10,752 Hi, Wayne. 599 00:35:10,832 --> 00:35:13,032 How's the truck? 600 00:35:13,112 --> 00:35:16,192 It had an oil leak. Damn, Cin.! 601 00:35:16,272 --> 00:35:18,872 You make sure you add a couple quarts in there before you head back. 602 00:35:18,952 --> 00:35:21,352 And I don't want to see one scratch on that - Okay, Wayne. 603 00:35:21,432 --> 00:35:24,232 What do you say we just go ahead and do this? 604 00:35:24,312 --> 00:35:28,712 Shelly Tambo, do you un-take WayneJones as your lawfully wedded husband? 605 00:35:34,112 --> 00:35:37,272 - I do. - Do you, WayneJones, 606 00:35:37,352 --> 00:35:40,392 un-take Shelly Tambo as your lawfully wedded wife? 607 00:35:40,472 --> 00:35:42,512 Yeah. I guess. 608 00:35:42,592 --> 00:35:44,952 Well, then, by the power invested in me to marry, 609 00:35:44,992 --> 00:35:47,472 I hereby undo what another brother of the cloth has done. 610 00:35:47,552 --> 00:35:49,432 Happy divorce, everybody. Congratulations. 611 00:35:49,472 --> 00:35:51,352 Thanks. Thanks, Chris. 612 00:35:51,392 --> 00:35:53,672 No problem, Shelly. Wayne, you there? Hang on a sec, hon. 613 00:35:53,752 --> 00:35:55,672 Shelly, congratulations. 614 00:35:55,752 --> 00:35:58,632 If Wayne and I ever decide to untie the knot, I hope it's as cool. 615 00:35:58,712 --> 00:36:00,552 Thanks, Cin. 616 00:36:00,632 --> 00:36:02,992 Fleischman, you're never gonna believe what happened. 617 00:36:03,072 --> 00:36:05,672 I saw this shack, and I couldn't tell it was abandoned. 618 00:36:05,752 --> 00:36:09,752 So I started running towards it, and then I fell into this sinkhole. 619 00:36:09,792 --> 00:36:11,672 Fleischman? 620 00:36:13,752 --> 00:36:15,312 Fleischman, what do you think you're doing? 621 00:36:15,352 --> 00:36:18,112 Just a little exploratory surgery. 622 00:36:18,192 --> 00:36:20,952 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. What do you think you're doing? 623 00:36:20,992 --> 00:36:24,632 Get away from the airplane! It's only an engine, O'Connell. 624 00:36:24,712 --> 00:36:27,352 Actually, it's not unlike the human heart. 625 00:36:27,392 --> 00:36:29,992 Did you tamper with my engine, Fleischman? Did you? 626 00:36:30,072 --> 00:36:33,552 Did you tamper with my airplane? You tampered with my engine! 627 00:36:33,592 --> 00:36:35,712 Fleischman, this is my engine! 628 00:36:35,792 --> 00:36:39,072 I just - I took off this thing. That's all. What thing? 629 00:36:39,152 --> 00:36:42,072 The intake rudder? You took it off? 630 00:36:45,632 --> 00:36:47,872 I, uh, kind of took this off as well, but- 631 00:36:47,952 --> 00:36:50,432 The valve cover? Give me it! 632 00:36:50,512 --> 00:36:54,072 The thing is, the valve seemed stuck. It had this gunk on it like a pulmonary stenosis. 633 00:36:54,152 --> 00:36:57,832 Give me that! The heart has a valve. It gets stuck, and the blood doesn't move forward. 634 00:36:57,912 --> 00:37:01,912 It gets backed up, and then you have a major problem, hence, our situation here. 635 00:37:01,992 --> 00:37:03,832 Fleischman, this is my plane. 636 00:37:03,912 --> 00:37:07,872 This is my private, personally private-owned plane. 637 00:37:07,952 --> 00:37:11,552 It doesn't work, O'Connell. What exactly did you think I was gonna do? Make it not work worse? 638 00:37:11,632 --> 00:37:13,912 Don't say anything. Just don't say a word. 639 00:37:13,992 --> 00:37:17,152 - At least you can try and start it up. - You've gotta be kidding. 640 00:37:17,232 --> 00:37:20,392 The thing was stuck. Now it's not stuck. Maybe it works. 641 00:37:20,472 --> 00:37:22,152 Moron. 642 00:37:24,112 --> 00:37:26,072 Come on. Give it a try. 643 00:37:26,152 --> 00:37:29,072 Come on, O'Connell. 644 00:37:34,712 --> 00:37:37,232 Easy on the clutch. 645 00:37:39,112 --> 00:37:40,472 Don't flood it. 646 00:37:43,112 --> 00:37:45,632 Nothing. 647 00:37:45,712 --> 00:37:47,872 Happy, Fleischman? 648 00:37:47,952 --> 00:37:50,432 I don't understand. It should work. 649 00:37:50,512 --> 00:37:53,272 Wait. Look. Hey, hey, look. O'Connell! 650 00:37:53,312 --> 00:37:57,712 I disconnected this thing here. It goes to the battery. Hold on. 651 00:37:59,312 --> 00:38:02,552 All righty! Fire it up! 652 00:38:02,632 --> 00:38:05,272 Yeah! 653 00:38:05,312 --> 00:38:07,272 Contact.! 654 00:38:11,152 --> 00:38:13,512 You did it. You did it! 655 00:38:13,592 --> 00:38:16,192 Yeah! Let's go home! 656 00:38:16,272 --> 00:38:19,352 Yeah! I did it! Me! 657 00:38:19,432 --> 00:38:24,392 What do you suppose Shelly and, uh, her friend there are talking about? 658 00:38:25,912 --> 00:38:27,792 Oh, I don't know. 659 00:38:27,832 --> 00:38:31,752 I suppose they're talkin' about clothes and boys and- 660 00:38:31,832 --> 00:38:33,672 and clothes. 661 00:38:34,992 --> 00:38:37,432 Nice girl, what's-her-name. 662 00:38:37,512 --> 00:38:41,872 She was down there at the Miss Northwest Passage with Shelly. Fixed her hair. 663 00:38:41,952 --> 00:38:45,392 Old friends are nice, aren't they? 664 00:38:47,392 --> 00:38:50,432 Did a nice job, as I recall. 665 00:38:51,832 --> 00:38:53,872 But, you know, to tell you the truth, 666 00:38:55,232 --> 00:38:58,712 I didn't hardly notice her at all... then. 667 00:38:58,792 --> 00:39:01,672 God! Wayne and his dumb tapes. 668 00:39:01,752 --> 00:39:05,192 Poison, Motley Crue, Aerosmith! Yeah, I know. 669 00:39:05,272 --> 00:39:08,632 I mean, there's so much going on today, and he's living in the past. 670 00:39:08,712 --> 00:39:13,032 Yeah. I mean, Steven Tyler's cute, but my God, he's almost 40. 671 00:39:13,112 --> 00:39:16,672 I'm sorry. 672 00:39:16,752 --> 00:39:19,352 Oh, no big deal. 673 00:39:19,432 --> 00:39:22,552 Holling's old, but he's got a motor on him. 674 00:39:22,592 --> 00:39:26,152 - You better tell Wayne to get some new tires. 675 00:39:26,232 --> 00:39:29,352 These are bald. I got a spare. 676 00:39:29,432 --> 00:39:34,152 Hey, girls. Protein conditioner, then sculpting foam. 677 00:39:34,232 --> 00:39:36,232 You got it, Cindy. 678 00:39:37,272 --> 00:39:42,192 Boys. They are kinda cute. 679 00:39:42,272 --> 00:39:45,312 Yeah. 680 00:39:47,032 --> 00:39:50,352 - You got the tuna sandwiches? - Yeah. 681 00:39:55,912 --> 00:39:58,752 - Okay. - Okay. 682 00:40:00,312 --> 00:40:02,152 Love ya. 683 00:40:12,192 --> 00:40:15,992 - See ya. - Not if I see you first. 684 00:40:48,192 --> 00:40:51,552 Shel, maybe we should plan a trip to Saskatoon. 685 00:40:51,632 --> 00:40:56,072 - What for? - Well, you could see Cindy and your old gang. 686 00:40:58,432 --> 00:41:02,712 Mm. I don't know. The Seals are playing Edmonton. 687 00:41:02,792 --> 00:41:05,432 Cindy's gonna send me a pair of socks from the mall. 688 00:41:05,512 --> 00:41:08,992 - Is that right? - It's the biggest mall in the world, you know. 689 00:41:09,072 --> 00:41:12,992 They have this whole store that sells nothing but socks. 690 00:41:13,072 --> 00:41:15,872 You know, Shelly, honey, 691 00:41:15,952 --> 00:41:19,072 you don't have to stay here in Cicely if you don't want to. 692 00:41:21,312 --> 00:41:25,752 Oh, great. First my husband marries somebody else, and now you don't want me either. 693 00:41:25,832 --> 00:41:29,352 Shelly, I didn't- I didn't mean that at all. 694 00:41:30,592 --> 00:41:32,512 No? No. 695 00:41:32,592 --> 00:41:36,512 I just want you to know that I wouldn't want to stand in the way... 696 00:41:36,592 --> 00:41:39,272 if it would make you feel better to be with your friends. 697 00:41:41,792 --> 00:41:43,672 Why would I want to do that? 698 00:41:43,712 --> 00:41:46,072 Well, they've been your friends for a long time. 699 00:41:48,912 --> 00:41:54,272 A very long time. Since we were kids. 700 00:41:54,352 --> 00:41:58,072 Might be more fun for you to be with people your own age. 701 00:41:58,112 --> 00:42:01,712 All the parties and the dancing and such. 702 00:42:03,832 --> 00:42:06,352 Well, that's stuff s okay. 703 00:42:09,792 --> 00:42:11,952 I do miss it sometimes. 704 00:42:14,952 --> 00:42:19,112 But- But I'd rather be here with you. 705 00:42:19,192 --> 00:42:22,792 You would? Mm-hmm. 706 00:42:24,152 --> 00:42:29,072 Shelly, I'm sorry if I make you feel old. 707 00:42:31,352 --> 00:42:33,832 Don't sweat it, babe. 708 00:42:33,912 --> 00:42:35,752 From now on, 709 00:42:38,272 --> 00:42:40,232 I'm making you young. 710 00:42:40,697 --> 00:42:47,075 -= www.OpenSubtitles.org =- 711 00:42:47,125 --> 00:42:51,675 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0